On diet process~

What can you eat when you really on a serious diet??

NOTHING!

You can't eat bread, biscuit, etc (flour), no sweet stuff as sugar will make you fat, nothing rich in carborhydrate and protein, so you can't eat rice meat as well, of coz no oily food, butter...

ALL YOU CAN EAT IS...

VEGETABLES

THe 1st 2 weeks was horrible. I think that was the worse thing I've done to myself...Its both mental and physical torture... I am so used to eating supper that I seriously find life very stupid for me to diet like this.

With people tempting me, I was crying and shaking myself inside, asking why am I making myself like this.

Before this...

I will not eat breakfast, my 1st meal will start with lunch, then grabbing tibits or anything that can be reached when Im at home, then dinner at around 8pm or later, then supper...

I was so used to this schedule..and suddenly I will have to eat breakfast, I can't eat anything after 7pm, ate only vege for breakfast, then apples and tomatoes(its nice!! and good for your skin)

In the begining I don even feel like eating breakfast...Now, every night im looking forward to the next morning..WHY? Simply because im allowed to eat, filling my stomach!!!

THe most miserable part was at night, after 9pm, I felt damn much like eating...And my beloved housemates will start eating right in front of me. Challenge me at the time when i was at my weakest.

Determination in the end still won the battle. Mc(a housemate) just knew me so well that she manage to keep me not eating. And thank you for my housemates and their boyfriends for listening to my frowns and complaints. I know its irritating..haha

After getting a little bit of result, I gain back my little bit of confident...and

Today, seeing my sisters eating superd lontong in front of me was okay...I wasn't that tempted already.

I am so proud of myself!

But when i just got down from the bus, 2nd sis say...

"aiyoooooooOOOOooooo GIRL ARRRR!!!"

"what?"

"very fat lerr...no waist already larrr...chutchutchut"

"THATS WHY I AM ON DIET LAR! :("

"Never mind larr...(in a low volume) at least boobs got bigger"

"@@"

BIG SWEAT

A reborn for me

I've come to a decision to lose down 8 kgs of fats after see-ing these pictures...

Seriously, i really think I look like a fat pig with other 3 girls so thin surrounding me in the pictures.

Stop saying I like to say im fat although Im not. The fact is, those pictures will convince you that im not exagerating...



Taken last week!



I haven't got myself into such a diet before...ONLY vege and apple everyday...

GOSH life like that is remarkably MISERABLE!!!!!

With my housemate everyday tempt me with delicious food...then ask me to lose down just the tiny 5kgs...then ask me to cook for them... then expecting me not to eat my own food...then midnight eating supper in front of me..then show me her look on how delicious it is...then asked me if i want..then says I've got no determintion to lose down weight when i got tempted...ARRGGGGGGGGGG

Im so tired of all these after just 1 week...I lost only stupid 2kgs so far...DAMN!

Sometimes when im so fedup like now(whole mind thinking of nice nice food), I asked myself why do I care so much...FAT THEN FAT LARR...haih WHO CARES??? GRRRR...

But I am still in the right conscious mind to know that this world is so realistic, oppurtunity comes with 1st impression...

Im gonna make myself prettier...rebond my hair, cut it and dye it at Kimarie probably this Thursday...

A reborn a punishment for myself for all the bad deeds I've done.

The last entry...A conclusion.

Throughout the months in 2007, everyday can be said to be a blast to me. I've done so many things that I think I myself can impossibly do. I've proven so many things to myself. And now, I shall officially call it a stop. I need to get back to the track of my own life, the life that i really wanted.

Tell you, all the bad things that happened didn't and haven't blew me down. In fact, it made me realised im stronger than i think.

After all and all these hilarious irresponsible things happened, I am glad that I've killed my own curiousity out in people and learnt more about the secret that lies between human.

If tomorrow Im dead, I won't regret. Because I've tasted life while im young.

I don't care how people judge me now, because i know somewhere there in this world, there are a few of my very good friends, people who really believe in me, really understand what I am thinking, what I've gone through, have faith in me. For once you were, now you are, and always will be...Cheers my friend! Thank you ;)

Potential lesbian

So many people had told me that I have the potential to become lesbian. 1 of my cousin sister once were so freaking worried after knowing i was single for so long(last time)...then she talked to me, told me not to go to the wrong path, because once I step into the wrong side, there will have no returns even when you regret.

I was in fact myself quite worried too. I still felt a sense of liking towards guy, yes, but I've long ago lost faith in guys community. You can say that maybe i know guys too well, and understand them, or Im born with half the guy's charactor myself.

Since young, I have male friends more than female. They are like a part of me because we can cling together so well. My college mates for instance, never really treated me like a girl.

Yesterday when we talked about this issue with another cousin of mine, his sudden explaination of things made me shudder a little. Because I hardly really need somebody to take care of, and I am more to the take care of people type.

He said I am a combination of male and female, a mental of a man, and a physical of a woman.

Agree?

I think this is bad..."liang tou bu dao an"

***Recently I've become so serious, found out that i talk lesser and lesser these days.***

If 2 things to name that can ruin my life, that will be my own bold charactor and love.

nothing

Step's request for me to write..I told her I've nothing to write about, so she asked me to write nothing ;)

In fact, I've so many short short thoughts to write about. Having that I can't photo blog my LIFE, as the camera isn't working.

Here, Yesterday went to Qbar with bunch of people. It was an unforgetable memory to me,something i personally think very sweet happened.

Basically this whole week is filled with normal-scheduled day. A well get to rest week where i skipped alot of clases, slept alot.

I've got so many thoughts running in my mind now~~

Anyway, Perfect from Judith McNaught is fantastic book!!! I actually cried reading that book...It made me feel like being in love again, coz its SOOOOOO romantic LAAA~~hahha

Kelvin's birthday

Somehow, the 10 of us cannot finish the 12 pieces of specially combined cheeses cakesss from Secret Recipe. So, we let the birthday boy feeds the people he wants to feed just to finish the cakes...And it ended up like this...

Kelvin says, "TO THE HELL, WHO ARE THE PEOPLE KEEP ON SAY WAN DIET? HMMMPP"

I was like, "OHHH OOO"

AND THEN....ARGGG...

I shall let the video do the talking...



I SWEAR 2 MONTHS NO CHEESE CAKE! Till now, my mouth smells cheese @@

In case you are wondering what am I doing at this hour, I am taking a break after a long night with QT(maths). Thanks for the test coming on Saturday~~

No joking, the failing rate for this subject was around 50% from my course, which is said to be the highest rate compared to other business course. Roughly giving you the idea how scary this subject is!

Pieces of it

Too rational sometimes can be suffering, its bad. Too emotional is definately not a good one. I remembered my teacher once told me when me and Hazel was at her house confessing our problems...

She said, "you see, both of you are a combination of 1 too rational, and 1 too emotional... if you 2 can add both together and spread out equally, then things will turn out sweet."

In relationship; family and friends..

I was once too emotional...now, i think im rather too rational...

hahah

Why things just can't turn to be smoother?

When it comes to dealing with humans, things tend to get complicated~

How many people can let down all the pride, ego, and self principles...for just the one in your life?Can you?

Its hard...

yet, there are!

I've seen so many...

I wished i can, and someone can do that to me you know...

unlucky january

Hp spoil, camera spoil...

please don't expect many updates, with my camera not working...i don't have SO much to write about. Addition to the fact that, Uni life is a bit pack with assignments and unfinished test...and of course not forgetting my happening life. HAHA

Anyway, this thursday will be Kelvin's birthday. Can't wait for the celebration!

Happy Birthday darling...(thats if u read! haaha)

Off to study...bye!

My maid

3 weeks ago...my maid ran away...

THIS, is a maid that we adored most...bought so many things for her, don't even allow anyone to scold her...coz she is just way so nice...

I really treat her like part of the family already...she worked for us 10 months...

today, she came back in a police car, with the construction guy behind my house...got caught at The Summit(shopping complex)..

From she was very thin when she just came here, she grows fat...all her own clothes she cannot wear dy...AND now, when we saw her in the car, she was so much way thinner...crying...

ITS SAD!

VERY VERY VERY SAD....

She don't come back in police car i still won't know i'll be so sad...

A somebody that you like so much, love, and cared...she ran away and came back in the police car...crying...

Probably she is now ultimately regret...then my mum, who was so heartache at that time, scolded her...i told my mum to just forget it. I was really so sad. My 2nd sis then went to scold her. I told them to just forget it. REALLY...can't bear to let her scolded...

afterall, everybody DO made mistakes...

Its kinda unforgiveable...WE REALLY TREATED HER DAMN NICE....but still...

Haih

Why in all reason that she run away. I told my sis i feel like going to the police station and ask her to give me a reason, WHY?

She have husband and a child....we treated her damn nice...

I cursed her everytime i wipe and vacuum the floor, wash the dishes, everytime i do the house chores...

But just, of all sudden when i saw her in the police car, no words can describe my feeling.

Heart ache!

Parents

I have no doubt at all that parent give unconditional love to their kids. 20 years old I am, I truly understand that anything happens to us, parent will be the one, to stand for us no matter how bad the situation is. While friends may want to help, but helpless to help. Where parent, when they are helpless to help, they will still think of a way to make us feel better.

HOWEVER...

Parent sometimes may be over protective. They mean good for us, thats for very sure. Thought it is good for us. Though sometimes, parent might me too worried of us falling down, feeling sad and thus, help us in everyway to avoid such. I did not say that this is no good at all. BUT, sometimes human just need to fall down, to bang on walls, to feel the pain before they are awake.

Agree?

No one makes no mistake. Although parent may be very experience, yes they may be right, but too much of care and love towards a person always made the scene blur. When things involve with emotions, we tend to made the wrong decision...

All a child need to do, is listen to their advice, think it over, and see whether it helps on the situation you are facing. Afterall, ITS YOUR LIFE! So, YOU DECIDE...don't let anyone put a ring on your nose like a cow.

I had too much fun dy...

Am sad...

Im like just being smashed up from a dream, and i wake up already...

HATE IT!

I've changed...yes..so much...played and thrilled myself too much...

I felt im irresponsible to myself now.

HATE IT!

I need someone now...NOW! anyone there? (hahaa)

HATE IT!

Why must it happened?

Where was the Shi Yee last time?

This is going to be a step ahead of my life.

Friends, thank you for trusting me. You know who you are. I love you guys! TRULY~

Im sad, i hate it because I disapoint my own self...(just im disapointed with myself)

And it happens that so many things happened today. ALL TOGETHER~~

With mum, 2nd sis, Wendy....I think Im going back to KL a little sooner than what I'd planned.

*BIG SIGH*

*taking a big big breathe*

I have a new mindset on personal responsibility and relationship dy!!!

WOAHHH...YEAYYYYY!!!

*giving myself an applouse*

I know I am stepping a step further of my life. Point there, ITS DEFINATELY BETTER. This worth celebrating...

CHEERS!

Let what happened a history, start anew. NOW N HERE :)

Thank you.

(I donno who am i thanking, just feel very damn glad that till now nothing very serious had happened. I am just truly glad that everyone gave me the chance to repent. I am glad and happy now that I feel like crying...hehehe =p)

Thank you!

(i'll sleep late tonight...need digestion again~)

History

Was in the car after visiting relatives house...

Talking to mum in the car...about me when i was a baby. About the gynea(how to spell?) doctor of my mum's, asked my mum to give me to him as my mum already got 3 daughters n 1 son, and happened that he have no daughter.

SIS-ES all don't let.

THen, my mum's sis which happened that she is expecting a son also on October (im at July). So that uncle went to the hospital and said to my mum, "you don't look at your daughter, i straight away take to my house, then October, i'll give u my son, i won't look at him also. This way then won't be unbearable...

Most important...MUM SAID I WAS VERY CUTE THATS WHY MANY PEOPLE WANTED ME...hiak hiak hiak :P

SIS-ES all don't let also.

So, i donno why i will come out with that question and i asked my mum, "so did you regret keeping me? i feel very tin te(its a waste keeping me) mar.."
Mum said, "CRAZY".
3rd sis said, "you pay all the money mum have spent in you when she had you, then you still say 'regret' that word"

Then i asked again, "WEEIII got spent so much money mer" =.=" (lagi feel wasted)

CERITA CAME...

Sis said... HMMPPP!!!! LAST TIME 1st - 10th mum, i remembered mum always in and out hospital wan arrr....Until midnight Dr. Goh also come our house...coz mum was having period...DAMN ALOT...dad see liao also takut~~"

I was like "SIMER??" @@

Sis said, "YALAR...mum always not at home wan..."

Mum said " CANNOT EVEN SQUAD DOWN...squad dy, the blood all like rush out..."

Sis, "Thats why you 7 months come out dy mar"

mum, "yeahh...you really like jump out from hell, people say 7 die 8 born (qi si ba shen)"

Am glad...luckily i survived and healthy *wink*

Friendship

Real friendship
requires no sorry,
no thank you.
When your friend
is in need, its the simplest
logic for a friend to help. And
for a friend to be helped.
-to vivien-

Isn't that what friends are for?
Happy Chinese New Year everyone!

Q Bar

Summary

FINE!



TELL you what, tomorow is freaking Valentine. After 1 week of full schedule, suddenly today, I've got nothing at all to do in the list. Never mind about no idea on what to do or where to go tomorrow....when im about to update what happened over the week, my photos just don wan to upload...



I'll just summarize it here...




Last Tuesday night, we(Kelvin, Vivi) went to Halo Cafe and happened that Mandy and Eileen was there(Twenty, singer of Rokaro?). With a little bit of alcohol effect, we manage to get high due to...errr...TERLALU stress on the coming week.



After HaloCafe chased us away (1am), we decided to proceed to the mamak nearby. Playing the very scary game called 'truth or dare'. Basically, well, the 4 of us are a combination of all VERY SPORTING people (proud). And there it goes for the daring part, climbing up to a lorry head and then roar like a lion, standing on the chair and shout out loud to promote herself, kissing a stranger on lips, singing to a stranger and hug him after, lying on the centre of the road for like 5 secs, standing on the chair to sing chorus part of 'tong hua' loudly. YEAP, we did it all. CHEERS!



Most of other time were then spent in the library which add up together can be more than the total time I'd ever spent in library for my ENTIRE LIFE. Seriously, and amazingly we were very stressed up, to finish up the assignment...coz we have so many Mid-term tests chasing after. The discussion was quite interesting though. Nice team mates, except 1. *wink* Glad to have met you guys!





Last friday was Jen wai's birthday. It was fun and exciting where we made an extra cream cake ourself, and of coz we cupped his face into it. Not forgetting out ritual procedure which is, add all the leftover food together that are available on the table, then make everyone eat it. Mission failed though. Only 3 of us (Kelvin, JenWai and me) ate the yucky stuff. I have picture of it but sorry, this lappie just don wan to read my memory card.




Somebody from S'pore(my blog reader) told me, i complain alot in my blog...

After accepting his comments...i spare some time to think about it. And yeahhh~~I realised i've been complaining all the meaningless shit these few while. mUAHAHHAhahah



I like him as in he gave comments directly to me, frank and straight. Not like some anonymous, commented some bad stuffs without any prove,in a sudden out of blue, then left people with all the puzzle then go gone just like that lefting a name of "Anonymous"



So, i'll give less complains and focus more on thoughts and life. THank you for the comments..Appreciated!



Q Bar on Thursday...anyone?

Betraying the girlshood...

If you are headache-ing what to give you darling on Valentine's day, here is a tip...

Many girls claim they dislike flowers rite?THE SECRET IS: ITS NOT TRUE. I mean, okay, part of it was true. Cause we girls, don't like guys to waste money. Coz flowers die easily and after soon, it will leave no value. But still, the truth is that, we like flowers laarr... is a waste of money, hell yeah, but receiving flowers from somebody is really sweet. Its not about receiving the flower from who or whatever...its more on, "oh i receieved flowers" or "someone someone...gave me flowers". The girls somehow feel very proud getting flowers...ESPECIALLY on valentines day.

I can assured you, almost every girls love them.

Not to say all girls like roses...some girls prefered sunflower, lily...

So make sure all the boyfriends reading my blog do the work. Buy a bouquet of flowers for you girlfriend ya.

By the way, give it to your friend isn't a bad idea also rite?

People I can't deal with...

If i say a thing in a simplest way, you don understand...

1 time...

(I explain)

2 times...

(I explain again)

3 times...

(I WILL EXPLAIN IN A VERY BAD MANNER LORR...)

As in, trying hard to control myself so that i won't lose my temper...Imagine, he was like, don't join into the disscusion, then probably not listening...then he can like, told us the thing that we had just finished discussing...then we will need to explain to him (right before after we just made everybody else understand), if 1 time nevermind LARR...but like 3 times! Also donno whether he understand or not...coz i bet he sensed that if he asked for the 4th time, we will burst out already.

Having the fact that, we are so stressed already...Please don't test my patience in crucial times like this LOR~~!!

I tried my best to avoid explaining to him dy. Let the rest lose their temper which almost happened today. So all the while after I've tried and tried, I left it to my assignment teamates to do the fantastic job(explaining to him)....

In the end i made up my mind that I will just look at him with that kind of look @@. Holding my breathe and try to hide my sour face inside.

Stay peace...he don't mean it i know. But thats even worse~ coz you can't get angry with him

Bad NY and V

Next monday(12/2) = Framework Accounting test 1
Next tuesday(13/2) = Microeconomics test 1
Next Wednesday(14/2) = English Assignment due (VALENTINE!!!)
Next Thursday(15/2) = Business Law presentation
Next Friday(16/2) = Business Law assginment due

Friday(16/2) Im going back hometown....Tell me, when can i shop for my new year clothes? Why can't they just don't sqeeze everything together, ON THE NEW YEAR AND VALENTINE WEEK STILL!!!

(Under serious stress!!!!!!!)

I-hate-to-get-pressie

This post might offend MANY people. Im sorry if you guys saw those that were given to me.

JUST...

I had enough of teddys...there are lots more in somewhere the corner of my hommie...More than the homosapiens in my house dy. So, please...

NO MORE SOFT TOYS!

Thank you.

On the journey...

To prove the theory right; boat reach shore will straight,
To prove everything will be alright,
To prove sunshine after rain,
To prove darkest before dawn...

Yesterday, i ignored everything, classes, lectures, the replacement class, assignment, attendance, bus ticket that haven't buy(its public holiday), meeting that had been arranged....

Immediately packed then came back to hometown right away.

Left a few messages to my pals before i go(tell them to mark my attendance, and cancel off the meeting), somehow i felt sorry for throwing everything to them just like that, leaving them with a huge question mark(which i know) and they didn't question further knowing something must have happened.

Once again, thank you for letting me being irresponsible.

So, im back home safely...its straight! :) I've proven!

I kinda love the long journey on the bus alone with a bunch of strangers. This is nice when you are moodless, cause you didn't have to entertain anybody but yourself and people won't be saying you are tiao geh laa, hao lian laa...whatever things that human can think of, just because you aren't smiling.

Well, this isn't the 1st time I do such a thing. No regret yet. In fact im glad that i came back LOL.

The 1st thing i did was hug my baby hippo! HE IS SOOOOO CUTEEE!!!!!!!!!

(Awww miss him already..)

But soon found that the wireless isn't available anymore, so I'll have to online in a normal way. Can't online in my room nymore~

FOOD FOOD & FOOD.

From 53+kg to 51.2kg this morning(target 49kg)...Came back, all I do was makan...for the freaking 24 hours, the only thing i ate was maggi in the morning, was on diet for chinese new year(the fact that sg long's food was horrible and lazy to eat outside, waste money also). I planned not to eat(used to tucking 1 meal daily) but food in bp are just too irresistable. So, there goes my supper when my sis tempt me.

So, afterall, things did get better. Theory proves right. So im happier i guess...