SO ANGRY!

2 days ago...my room is in this mess...i took out all the books (left to me since my 2 sisters and bro <22>) to give away. Cause all along, when i wanted to giveaway...my beloved 1st sis will tell me to KEEP or sell them. So it all kept inside my cupboard eating up my spaces in the room.

LOOK!

These are the books...and more to come...

Half of me that high. One day, trees is coming to give me nightmare!

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there are 8 more photos!!! BUT I JUST CAN'T UPLOAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

M SO ANGRY!

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It has been 2 days, woke up to find my lips full with dried blood. Am I being haunted by ghost? Or im suffering for cancer? Mum said, probably body over heat...

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How many 2 people can talk like the world is going to end tomorrow?

If you don't get what i mean, it means : talking non-stop la~ haiyo...

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I hate people do things without "jiao dai" (donno wat in english)

Like very irresponsible..left a "what happened question mark" to the opponent.

eg: left msn without a word, when we chat half way...then i wait wait wait...nobody inform me that the line went off. Until this morning! HMMP!

HAHAHHAHA

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TOday early morning,7 sth, i wake up so early to find surprises. And i found 1! hehehe yeahhh!!!

My friend message in a good way to say I'm sweet..wohoooo!

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BYEBYE. SO many messy short short words today.

PEning~~

Value

THings we saw...all have a worth. Easier to understand...How do we value? $$$MOney$$$ We said it as everything has got a price tag.

No matter how old a thing is...It has a value, a sum. But value-ing a human? THat will be the most complicated sum a mathematician can count!

You work. You were valued...mostly through the money, mind my words! The money that you have invested in your studies. Im not being narrow minded. My point of view is that..so many people reach University BUT they actually aren't qualified at all. Old people say, reaching degree level, people will look at you highly. Automatically, your value rise. But Mr. Robert Kiyosaki said, "the times has changed, advice haven't"

BEcause you know what, last time education cost ALOT. And most, i said most! not all, who get the chance to further their studies will learnt. And mostly they are working cum studying. THey are learning, or adapting or praticing the knowledge they are learning.

Most people nowadays...go college because they have money! Or maybe force by their parents. I ask you, how many people say...

"YEAHHH!! Im going to learn something new today in college!"

haha not me...not you. Perhaps even susah(difficult) to find even one. Why? BEcause things come too easy. Or maybe the education system now should change?

So i change Mr Kiyosaki's words...

"The times had changed, education system haven't"

Now, the younger generation of us, is much more inteligent COMPARED to the older ones. Technolgy helps of course.

Last time, it seems degree level is unreachable...and now~ it is everywhere!!

So the price has drop. MEaning, human's value drop. But why oil, sugar, rice keep on increase???

My GOD! Will next time sugar's price become higher than human's price?

So we don't keep children anymore...we keep sugar! Buy house to keep sugar?

Im insane~

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On my friendster old post last time, i posted an entry call "waiting" remember? I said...

"indeed, waiting is a nice feeling...is like a hope...about to reach, yet to come. Have you ever taste this kind of feeling before? because waiting is a blank future hope..so we will fantasize positive feedback that deep in our heart, we wanted! (",) Well, of course, if positive feedback becomes a reality, that will be so much better. However most of the time, i doubt that will happen rite? Instead often we get what we really don't want! So, although the waiting period of time is short, but i honestly enjoy it. Where you can dream so much about things you want it to happen. And who knows? It might just happen 1 day...."

Now i want to add something. You DO feel good when you are waiting but

YET you know...no matter how long-er you wait... how positive the fact is...how happy of waiting and it comes later..

WHen in the end...you know you CAN't HAVE IT......

It feel SUCKS!

So afterall...its only a short, temporary happiness but long term sadness.

POk moNG

I don understand...

What is so nice about touching girl's butt???

....
....
...
...

I was at Petaling Street 2 days ago. Crowded as it always be. Noisy and stuffy and raining and it was a bad day...

But the barbeque fish outside Hong Leong Bank is nice. Not as nice as last time though...for ur info, not as spicy as last time already. And the Air mata kuching, also the soya bean around that place is yummy too.



BAck to the story...

What is so nice of touching people's meat? *sigh...its so stupid

Ron wondered why i never freak out...I thought it was just a piece of meat.

EVen if you cried or shout or whatever, it has already been touched. So what is the use of freaking out?

@@ waste energy~

Like that guy will regret if you cry...

I was wearing a pair of jeans lucky me you would say. But I expected this kind of things happened when you go places like Petaling Street or below Eastin Hotel. Hahaa

Thats why i say, guys are mostly pervert creatures. Stupid. No brain. Dumb. Aiyah~ they are idiots!

I told Ron, as long as they don't steal my things...I very happy liao~

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I think i had a crush on my far away cousin. Its my cousin's cousin. Never saw him before until yesterday when he helped my sis to shift my things to Sg long. Maybe because my sis praise him and his family too much. But the moment i saw his face, I was straight away shy, and blushed without even saying HI to him. Then I was wearing a shit shirt with shit short pants, I pretended all the while that he doens't exist. And later, my sis annouced his number, coz that number is way too nice, so i remembered. Couldn't help but he pop up in my mind many times. I sms him to say thank you. He didn't seem to care much and wish that I had enjoyed.

A guy help you to shift things without saying 2nd words and help you to arrange everything nicely and neatly without you even asking him to...

is a goodie good guy!

And a guy never ask for a treat and say no when you offered him a treat and insist to show us the way to times square just to make sure my sis who had stayed at KL for 10 years don't get lost...

is a fantastic guy!

How many people was like me? Simply crush like that? ALOT

It was bothering me for quite sometime.

Then i figured out. I don't even know who he is. I saw him properly only once. Conversation can be counted with fingers.

Conclusion?

We will see each other again once a year for sure. :)

Chinese New Year

I still love Ron because he is way too sweet.

A good guy is unresistable. But a sweet guy like Ron, haha who knows he is better?

Clowns

I don understand why kids love clowns.

It was at KLCC, deserted place inside Isetan at kids corner....

Suddenly i saw a colorful creature beside me. It frightens me more than I see a ghost!!

Coz the clown is moving! Ghosts I saw aren't. And he says "hello" to me!

I jumped! then the clown came near me. FUCK!

Luckily he saw my face changed, then he go away~

Later, while i was running-cum-walking out of that area~

I saw another clown playing with a kid...and then, the kid cried!

Comon...stupid clown GO AWAY LA!

And another 1 playing kids' laptop with the promoter~~

Why put so many clowns in that stupid place while there were only little people inside?

donno who the heck invented clown.

Later when i wanted to submit a picture of clown, i found a "ihateclown" website! www.ihateclown.com

Sorry i can't find clown pictures to put here...Found one but is copyrighted. Better don't! Later scared my reader away..

Supernatural experience

How many people had encounter this kind of thing?

1st time:
Subang Jaya SS15, My place apartment, Hazel's house.

About last year of this time Edel and me were at Hazel's place. Talking and chit chatting. Hazel in another room. I saw a woman in red clothes looking at us. I thought my eyes were wrong or whatever, I blink blink, she's gone. Definately it's my wild imagination again. That was what i thought at the time. So I ignored it and forget what happened.

We carry on talking and talking. I never mentioned a thing to Edel. About like 1 and a half hour later~ my friend suddenly gave out a small shout. He said he saw a figure. THERE! Then i ask him, "what?". He stunned for a while. And I asked again, "hey, what?" Then he said, "nothing la nothing"

I never clicked these 2 things together until the next morning, when my friend is gone, Hazel asked what we were talking about. Only when I organized my mind and told Hazel what happened, these 2 incidents cling together. So Hazel asked me to investigate what Edel saw yesterday.

WIhtout telling him what I saw, I asked him, "eh, yesterday remember you said you saw a figure, then suddenly u jamn there?"

he said "no laa...nothing la...maybe not enough sleep, see wrongly"

"hey, tell me what you saw. Because previously i saw something too. Is it a red color clothes woman"

"yeah, and its long hair. I saw a while only" he said.

***we saw it at the same place, wearing red colour clothes.

Then i told Hazel about it. And hahaa, she don't quite believe anyway. Forcing herself not to believe maybe, coz at the time she was alone stayying at that house.


2nd time:
Tasik Y Batu Pahat, 2am. Nothing to do this late so we thought of maybe a stroll at Tasik Y will be cool. Never know the lights were turned off at midnight (coz we always heard couples or friends will go there at midnight want).

WHen I saw it was so dark, I quickly asked my friend to turn away. While we are doing that, from faraway, like 5 meters away, inside the park, I saw a child in white dress, very lovely dress, running happily inside the park. First glance, nothing special. 2nd glance, why the child is alone? the child is like only 3 years old. 3rd glance, MY GOD, is 2am in the morning!!! why in the hell they come out at this hour!? 4th glance, nothing more.

I told my friend to leave immediately. He follow as I said. But as he did so, getting nearer to the place I saw the child (because there is no other way to go out except going through that way) I looked and looked at the same place again. I am quite sure I saw a child there just now. But nomore.

Later when i asked my friend did he see what I saw, he said Im bullshitting.



3rd time,
11-12am, Taman Limpoon, beside cemetary place, fetching my friend back. I always hated to fetch Hema back. 1 thing because its super dark; no lights at all and its all trees beside, somemore beside cemetary, then I always got lost at that place. DAMN IT. So, I take the longer way, fetch Hema back 1st, then Wendy and Step later.

On the way fetching hema back, I saw an old man below a tree. 1st glance, an old uncle figure. 2nd glance, did I see wrongly? *on my car's highlight* 3rd glance, no more. Im scared! Suddenly my brain hang. Luckily Im not alone. Drop Hema back, then get away as quickly as possible until the main road.

I asked Step and Wendy, did they saw it? They asked,when. I explain, did you realised I suddenly on my highlight? They say ya...that time laaa, I said. BEcause i thought its too dark, I saw wrongly.

Wendy said she saw. But at somewhere else. Not that place, and something else. We didn't think much or talk about it again.

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Everytime when I talked about this, my heart beats faster and my eyes become watery and my "bulu roma" will naik wan. If you said im scared, i don't think so. Anyway its 1 year ago, and they didn't harm me. Anybody have same experince? Lets' share!

Im going back to Kl later, 2.30pm bus. By the way, I won't have anywhere to stay after October at KL. Sis shifting back to bp already. Anyone's place can let me stay? hee

So happy!

Today miss WEndy send me a message. Ask me what's wrong! She said she felt that I was very sad this few weeks. Because she is busying with the funeral things(her grandpa passed away last week)..that's why didn't ask me whats wrong.

HEEE

Seee~~!! My friend can sense that I am sad. Bluerk. But Hazel can pinpoint my way out of despair without me telling her the whole thing. She understands myself more than I do.

*BIG FAT HUGS to you both

Isn't it great to have friends like that?

I love you both. Thank you for everything and friends forever.

Shout Out Loud!

Comon everybody! Lets shout out loud!

RELATIONSHIP IS NOT EVERYTHING

HEHEE this is dedicated to alot of my friends out there~

1) Hazel who forget friends after she got colin. And changed drastically because of her beloved. LIke from black to white.

2) Wendy, who was once a goody good friend. "Always there friend". Now no more. Talk only about her bf. And keep sms-ing when we go out.

5) Mr Brian...haih brian brian~~ sometimes when you are cooking, the fire cannot be too strong, rice will burnt. Too slow, rice not cooked. Moderate enough liao. oK?

4) Vivien, Shupin, Kimberly if you read, and Mark! HOOOiiii, single is precious. Appreaciate it. Treasure it. Friends good ma...won't break up. :p


I know im at no status to say this. But don't frown because you are single or get too crazily in love. Life, not only have relationship. Love not only from bf/gf. Open up your heart and you will know that, every day there are many more things worth appreaciating. than those unworthy bastards out there. Live for yourself. Not for your loved one.

So lets' shout out loud!

I CAN LIVE FOR MYSELF

I am a survivor. We are survivor. Keep on suviving, we are survivor.

***This whole post is a crap~

Answer me

What will you do to a friend that "luo jing xia si" (drop stones when you are inside the well)---- I supposed that is the meaning.

He was my kind of good friend. Maybe I've mistakenly thought he was one. But he was after me while having a 3 years long girlfriend. I rejected and rejected, he kept calling for the terms of friend. A good friend. Well, that guy gave me quite an impression. And because he was one of my teacher's son, i wouldn't want to provoke him. For I was single at the time, i answer almost all of his called. Told him about my history, family stuff when he asked. He was pity, sad. And I remembered this guy told me, no matter what happened, he will do whatever he can to protect me, as a friend.

Later when we get closer, I asked him. Hey, what if i accepted you to be my boyfriend...what will you do to your girlfriend. 3 years isn't short. He explained...he said he wouldn't want to risk. If i accepted him, only he will break up with his gf. He keep on saying that, his gf was only a companion, no love. And it will happen for sure. Just one day.

It happens that my ex-bf that time later, was his friend. And he becomes some sort of our matchmaker unintentionally. He was sad. We were helpless. But then, when something happened on us, well, nobody is to blame when a relationship goes wrong rite? Okay~ my ex blamed alot on me...really like everything? And he scolded me on my blog through comments. I take it. My friend, my ex- friend...the so called "will protect me" added to his comment, sided him, scolded me.

And worse is...he called me like a good friend again. Explaining, he will need to 'act' in front of him, cause they were childhood friend. Worse still, he said all kind of bad words in front of me about him. Say, they were friends till now because he have got some kind of authority. Because of his(my ex) family. HAH. funny

Now, they were still good friend if not best friend. And, he is still with his gf.

I've stop taking his call for quite sometimes. For months...giving reason, didn't hear the hp ring, or going out or outside when i picked up. Guess he got my meaning. He stoped calling. I wondered what should I do when he call again.

I think he is cheap.

Lie begins from school

Tittle : My Interest
Year : 2001
Writer : Tan Shi Yee
Note : don't expect too much from a Form 1 student. I guess i copy this from somewhere...coz my IN GE LIS wasn't that good back then.

Everybody have their interest. So do I. For me, my interest are reading. I prefer to read story books because they are interesting and gives me more knowledge. Next, I like watching television. I like watching television because it is very interesting. The movie i like were "looking for star, top fun, super sunday and more. Those are movie will gives me joys when I watch it. Besides that, I also enjoy listening to music. I like westlife, N'sync, britney spears and more. Whenever I'm free, i will listen to their new song. I enjoy it very much.

Tittle : My teacher
Note : Maybe this one is i write one.

Mrs. Chan, who is born on 15th of June 1952 and now she is 49 years old. From she was very young, she has a ambition. It is to become a kind and helpful teacher. Now, her dreams come true. She have become an afternoon supervisor in TIGS. At first, she was teaching chemistry in school. She become an afternoon supervisors because of she is a kind and very polite teacher. She has been teaching for 14 years and she was really so happy with it. Her favourite foods are goreng pisang, rojak and more. SHe also like mineral waters. She enjoys swimming during her pastimes. She loves to wear long skirt very much. She enjoys holidays. She like to go to Europe and New Zealand. She looks happy all the time. When she is in school, she was so busy preparing lessons for her students and giving advise to her students. Mrs Chan is a very kind, polite and responsible teacher. Her student like her so much.

Firstly, I cannot understand why, i write this kind of stupid grammar IN GE LIS. I can't make myself to dig out my primary school's essay. And i wondered, which day which day to come, maybe I will read back all this post that I've written, and found myself back in the situation now. STILL lots of stupid grammar IN GE LIS. *Sigh

How many people wrote their interest is reading when they are small? How many people say they want to become doctor and lawyer when they are to fill in their profile. Or teacher...hik hik. ME! ME! ME! ME! More than half the student hated Mrs Chan. hikhik. I donn know that part where I said she likeS goreng lisang and rojak come from where.

Why can't they cut off those essay to stop us from lying? *eyes rolling*

Most girlfriend are like prostitute

I don understand...

hahaa, when i wrote those words "i don understand" i laugh myself and think i sound like those small kid that don understand so many things. I bet I've use these words more often than I'd imagine. Maybe I am really too childish. Or think too much. Or crazy. Who knows?

okay~enough of syok sendiri...back to the topic.

Agree with me? most girlfriend are prostitute? Yes? nO? Donno?

You have sex with your gf?
How many times a week you 2 have sex?
U see her you feel like having sex?
What is the ratio of you seeing her and you 2 have sex? Everytime?

hey hey hey, I know sex is a human needs although i STILL don really agree. And fuck those guy that only have sex all in their mind. I hope and wish and pray that 1 day they will meet some pervert prostitute, use candle or put ice on their erect penis. HMMP! right after organsm!

I got a friend, a girl, bet with me, she is only 17 years old man. Seventeen!!!! You know what...okay~first first, she is basically not my friend. But her bf is my friends' friend. LEts name the bf, the fuckup guy Simon, age 19 i guess. Im sorry to other Simon in the world. But, okay~~ this girl, who is only 17 got selected to national service. Only 1 and half month they don't see each other, that guy become a stupid pervert, sex maniac already!!!

HUUUUHHHHH~~~ You know what they do??? The girl is coming back home for "chim ming" festival. Forget about it if you don't know what is it, not very important. What the important thing is, a week before she comes back, that fuckup Simon, book hotel, CHEAP hotels, and happily tell all of us, so called his friends, and told us, they are going to have sex in the hotels!!!

They are like so proud of it? Then, all of us, reflex reaction, tease them maa~~ THAT moment, i really wish somewhere there is a hole that i can burried girls' face inside. The girlfriend kept quiet and just smiles smiles~~

*sweating* And worse of all, his girlfriend, donno aware of it or not, i bet she knows...he told us in front of his gf also. If ronald do this to me, i will go to the hotel, and play SM with him. If he dares! blek, he won't.

So all the way, she comes back from NS, what they guy want only sex!!! gosh, becoz they have no place to have sex...then they book hotel. Borrow money from my friend somemore, to pay for the hotel room. And he is the kind of asshole that go out makan or yamcha don't pay money and like say loudly when people struggling to pay... say "I got no money". Borrow money don't pay also. What kind of human is that??!!

I think he will prefer to find a prostitute if he got enough money to get one. WAHAHAHAH

I wonder how many couple do that. Maybe only a few...coz they have place to have sex. Thats why i hate sex. It turns a beautiful loving relationship to ugly ones.

:( maybe is normal for adults...im just a small kid still not used to the sex world. Too innocent. *erhem

IM crazy

Would anyone believe me, if i say im crazy? This is a serious post, not a funny dunny want...And i am serious im crazy.

I need a psychiatrist more than anyone to correct my mindset. Or somebody knock me on my head and made me lose my memory please.

I think alot, mostly negative. Sad for no reason. Cry myself to sleep and wish i will die everytime. I will think nobody love me, everyone want to hurt me. And do many stupid things. Including breaking up with Ron for my own very funny but logical reason. I think.

I knew I'd been ridiculous. I can't control it. You know what I told him? I want to stop myself from being hurt again. Love nobody and nobody love me. Only when you care/love about somebody, that person can hurt you. Ron is one, my family is one.

Am i wrong that nobody wish to hurt another person purposely? Who will want to mean it when they love that person? Is my thinking very wrong? Correct me if I am wrong. Everybody have their very point of view...everyone have their reason for doing something. A purpose that mean good, but because everyone thinks differently, they take THAT purpose as different type of treatment, reason...i donno what i am talking about.

I didn't mean to hurt ron, but the fact is I already hurt him. I mean to protect myself. So is what he did to me that makes me came to this decision...i know. But i can't control myself.

Im crazy.

Friendship come and go

So many times, i thought i've known a person like for a lifetime. Knew one from inside out. I believe this occurs to everyone before. But it happens too many times on me till now, i believe nothing is for sure anymore. Once in standard 2, i remembered Wong and Teo, we used to be 3 in a group, stick together through thick and thin, although quarrels do happened, but we seems closer than real sisters, hatred doesn't stayed overnight.

Then, Wong shifted to JB if i wasn't mistaken, after that we lost touched. My life goes further on primary school till lower secondary, i then stick together with Manjit, an punjabi friend, and Michelle, a typical innocent girl. People wear different view on us, weird to describe better, for an indian stay so close to chinese. We study together, have the same aim, to strive in studies, and to have fun in life. We were the only non malays in TIGS (my secondary school), afternoon session. TIGS for your information, is a top school in Batu Pahat, so there are classes called RKM 1 & 2. Its for the top student who got straight A's in UPSR(primary school examination). I didn't do well, WE didn't do well, so we were ended up being in afternoon session, 3 of us, where the other chineses were all in RKM.

The teachers all see us like 3 aliens stuck in afternoon session. But that, bide us together. Choral Speaking, made us even closer, we manage to merge as the top 5 finalist in Malaysia. Michelle then, got straight A's in PMR. So she was then being transfered to Science 1, me, Science 2, Manjit who didn't do that well went to Science 3. How cruel is life.

I begin a new life in Science 2, with the another one chinese girl who fell the same fate as me, 6A's 1 B. Our thoughts are different, but im forced to being close with her. Again, drama competition came into our life in form 4. A group of 15, went till Kelantan, Zone C Malaysia 1st runner up. After it finish, it finished.

I was then elected president for Interact, lucky me. GOt to know some new friends. A number of them. Gott really close. People like Elaine and Hanjin who were my sisters, Jason the council president while im the deputy president, Lifong and Yong wee as far as Yong Peng and alot more...

Again, i thought they are going to be my lifetime friends. But it was gone again after our presidency in Interact ended. We lost touched because everyone was busy preparing for exams, then further studies. When i was preparing to further my study, Wendy and Hazel came into my life. Glad that till now we still keep in touch. I darenot hope that this will last, but i only say, i appreaciate those moment we spent together just to have a talk or the effort made by them when im at most downwards part of my life.

College then gathered a group of friends. I thought even if it will go gone, will have to wait for another 3 years. Because worse to worse, we will need to stay together in a deserted place, Sg LOng, want or do not want. But you cannot predict life how good you think you are, how intimate a friendship will be, maybe its heaven's will, we were apart. Vivien left us, she passed the exam. All of us failed.

Not the end yet, but half the year we are apart from 1 year friendship. What is in your mind? Like a wet paper let dried for 1 hour then splash water on it for half an hour, to test whether it tore. Yes, it tore. But not the whole paper gone. Some were still there, but most change.

Sigh...

The sad smell of life

Age 15 was an important year for every malaysian teenager. They are going to sit for Penilaian Menengah Rendah. As young as that, naively, Kim thought that it was time for her to work. Working for the unfairness she had been treated in her life. The experts used to say that family influeced place the most part when it comes to dealing with youngster. Indeed, so although she wasn't treated good in the place of her family, she not only do not want to accept but tried to change the fact.

If it was something to blame, then it will be blamed on the time she came to this world wasn't right

because she was the youngest in the family. Like what most people would think, and she came across many people who had told her, being as the youngest would be best adored and loved. Everytime when people said this to her, she felt a strong knife poked into her heart. Not aware of what is wrong, but being in the youngest of the other 3 girls above her and only boy in the house wasn't the best thing anyone could expect.

That year, when she was to sit for PMR, she thought it will be the best year for her to change her life. Like an ugly duckling going to transform into a beautiful swan. For that the only heir in the house didn't do very well. She thinks that if she outwin the king of the house, she would become the princess. So from that day since this mindset came across her mind, she works like a bull for silly 7A's. A straight full A's a somebody to be proud of by their family would achieve.

You cannot underestimate the power of proving it right, for that is the best she had done in her life yet

For exactly one year, she did everything that can be done, saving the money to buy reference books, work book, uncountable tuisyen just to tell you her spirit. But, what is really inside her that is burning, can never be described by words. It is very easy to strive straight A's for a top student. But being in the 6th class out of 10, then you can perhaps close your eyes and imagine it for real. Although many teachers seem to feel it was impossible, the narrow eyed she received, the unhelpfulness, she took it with open heart just for the very day.

She burried all the pain and bitterness only for the day to come

When it was almost there, she grab every single last second that she had, study and keep studying, revise and keep revising, do and keep doing, check and rechecking. She thought, untill her last breath, she would want to strive it the best for herself this time, just to twist turn back, to taste, the original smell of life. The fragrance of proper life.

The moment when the result was annouced, when everybody else is accompanied by their parents, her teacher congratulated her. She becomes the best 2 person in her class, 6A's 1B. When she saw the result sheet, a full lengh of sigh goes around her fast pounding heart. A great sense of disapointment for herself. Not very sad, it was still the best record in her family had ever achieved.

No matter how hard she tried...how good she strive in her life, only in the end she found out that she can never change the fact

Happily, she showed it to her parents. They are proud, perhaps. This will be forever a puzzle missing a piece. From her perspective of mind however, it was more unusual than ever she had seen. If you think they will not wear a smile on their face, then you are very wrong. They celebrated but like I just said, they were only wearing a mask that looks like it was already so long never been teared.

Few months goes with the attention she always demanded in her life. But as time passes by, water flows and trees grow, it fade away just at the right time. Almost without her realising, it was then, gone.

Although she failed for the best, she proved one fact that life will turn her forever like this

After all she had done, after all the spirit and working hard, after she had received the proud from the school, friends, teachers especially, that once thought it was impossible, after all the water splash away only to hope heat will be given in return, it was a big fat juicy "no" in her life. She cried herself so many times until it was numb. Unfeelingness anymore.

The feeling was like investing all the money she had, for a business that she thinks will earn more than a life, like many other same case. The answer was then found. It wasn't a simply answer. But answer for her life.

No matter how hard she tried...how good she strive in her life, only in the end she found out that she can never change the fact

Life is not as simple as that. It is far more complicated than what a pure and innocent heart can think or imagine. This, is the smell of her life. The unusual life.

written by,
Cheryl Tan

***HAHAHAHA, how how how?? I suddenly got the idea running through my mind to write this. I think this is my 1st piece of so SERIOUS hand piece. My god, i donno i can be this good...wahahah. NEHH, whatever you think, i've gone above my roof to express these feeling out! Lets comment and tell me whether you feel it is okay?