Saturday, August 25, 2007

Winning by losing

Many times during arguments, we run away out of objectives and argue for winning. Its normal. Most of the human want their dignity. When we were threatened by somebody better than us, we want to prove we are better instead. We closed our mind on listening comments, we want to convince the other party that our way is also okay...

Once he/she is convinced, we felt satisfaction, achievements and in another way, we won the fight.

However during the process, nasty arguments occurs. Relationship were harmed.

If we can win by losing out first, agreed with the other party, let him/her have their dignity, then try to persuade him/her to consider also your opinion, other alternatives, why not? If he/she is wise, and his/her dignity is given, she won. But if you step back and look at the overall picture, perhaps you will win. Probably she will try your way and it is achieved happily without hurting the relationship.

When a person wanted to win so much, you let the person win by not fighting. He/she will felt meaningless winning. Therefore he/she will feel meaningless fighting over nothing.

1 hand claps no sound!

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