The Art of talking

I wanted to write this since long ago, but nothing great can come out. Lets try!

When you talk more trying to achieve something, you will realize, how you made people FEEL is the thing. First, you have to be clear, what is your position now in the conversation, and what you want to achieve in the end.

Who is the boss now? From there, you either act like a boss, or you act like you are NOT the boss. Coz eventually, people will know what is the situation itself. Not convincing?

When you are at school talking to teacher, he/she is the boss. Although he said, "can you pls help me to do......?" The, "can you pls..?" is acting like he is not a boss, but he is the boss. Coz you are not able to reject.

When you are dealing with a hotel manager, looking for a venue, NOW you are the boss(although you are student at school), but the position now is different, coz you are giving them money to earn, you are their customer. Yes, they may have many other customers rather than you student, but that will depends on how you speak, your power in speaking, the feeling that you give to the manager.

A cooperate manager that are confident they have plenty millions to book the hotel, they too are same position as you students, both are customers. Both book 100tables for 1 million(lets say). So the hotel will have same profits. Depends on how you deal with the manager. You don't tell me the hotel will make special discount for you all because you are student. Out of 10 maybe 1 hotel will. Others won't!

Twisting and turning the way you said things can make you realize different effects. Try it. But don't overdo it. I believe people do not take things that are too perfect. One fact we cannot deny is that, human ARE selfish. When you wanted to do something, there are of coz SOMETHING beneficial to your own when you are doing it. At the right time, tell them what is the thing. Coz nothing is perfect, and human are selfish, therefore human are allowed to be selfish when the selfishness is acceptable + in a deep desperation.

Well, my something beneficial to your own may not be harmful, so maybe selfish is not the word, but I can't think of any words to replace it.

Some people just do not care the importance of words they use. A "please", "may I", "can you" can means so much different. There are many others, but I can't name it all. The concept is that, is not the words that makes the difference, is the FEELING of your words that can bring to the person you are talking to. How your words make people feel, is the overall conclusion people make in you.

Besides that, repeating good things and don't mention too many times bad things is a nice feeling you can bring to people. Human are forgetful. Very forgetful. They need to be reminded so that good things are remembered and vice versa. Well, you can don't believe it. Try this, tell your girl/boy friend, "I love you" repeatedly 10 times everyday. He/she obviously knows you love him/her. But it is the psychology effects that will make him/her more happy.

Yes, is all psychology. I find all these VERY interesting. Still discovering, still learning. ;)

Whoever that thinks there is a better way, or anything that is very wrong, I open my heart to let you convince me wrong. You are welcome. I love this kind of discussion, lets improve ourself. Don't stop here.