tired

It seems to everybody that we are handling this relationship very well..but book shall not be judged by its cover..this explains our relationship..many times,frustration and anger are just on for 2minutes and with a swallow of saliva, it is then being forgotten until it happens again..and again..and again..and to the point that it burst out like now. Its been several times that i felt he is already given this relationship up, because no matter how hard i try to solve the problem, he seems motionless, just keep asking me what do i want in a very bad manner.. It hurts! Im jus merely trying to figure things out but what i get in return is a pail of cold water poured over my face.. I kept telling myself that i treasure this relationship, i can't act emotionally, i must control myself but! What do i get in return..u can guest it.. Im kinda tired.. I told him not to regret today after i had a talk with him about everything. He still remains the same. Thus, i told him that i take back my every words, pretend i had never said it before, and we give each other freedom to do everything each wants to do..why fuck do i care for his feeling so much? Have he cared for my feelings??? man, i hope i am not, but i am really sick of things repeating and he being motionless again..as if i am the only person wanting this relationship to continue on..i don want to work the relationship on my own! Fuck off!