If it hurt her that much...it hurts me even more. Its all because of that blog I wrote weeks ago about the friends. She said we are no longer friend ever since I wrote that post in my blog. "How many years friends we are, and she(refers to me) doubted on my personality", she said.
I know I really acted so childish yesterday. I was drunk and angry with whatever hell I am in. I am so sad over everything. Feeling hopeless. She asked me to stay overnight but how am I to face everything after what had happened in the early next morning when we are finally awake? How am I to face her parents when I am in such a stage... Can she understand why and let me?
We are both stubborn.
To many, love are their last thing left after losing everything. To me, pride will be the only thing left for me. So no matter what in that kind of situation, I am not gonna lose my pride. I know its stupid. But my life is so stupid.
We had both say things really hurtful. I hope we apply what she told me yesterday...drunk and when angry words are to be deleted. Because i know we are just so hurt...nobody really meant what we said.
I sent messages to apologised...but it is being ignored. This seems to be our cross road, depending we have the will to save this friendship or not. How much we value it and believe this is just one of the obstacles we have to face to make oure frienship grow even stronger than before.
My eyes now are very scary when I woke up. I think back what happened and I remember she hit me because I told her to fuck off and told her I can't stay over because I have my pride. Its more painful in the heart.
I hope after what happened yesterday we can become friends like before again. Never mind it takes time. I will wait for the day to come. Because I treasure this friendship.
1 comment:
Hey, just visiting your blog after a super super long time. That is one scary eye you've got there. Anyway, hope things work out for you. I agree with you though, for me pride is more important too. Other things come and go, but if you lose your pride, you lose your self-respect.
=)
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